Until The End of My Days
by AshleighWrites97
Summary: Gertude's inner thoughts from the aftermath of King Hamlet's death to her own. T to be safe.


_**Until The End of My Days**_

Gertrude had no idea that her secrets would ever come to this. Her secrets involving her own brother-in-law had gotten her husband killed by the man she loved. And yet, even though she was just as much to blame for her husband's death as her lover was, she had no regrets. No regrets about falling in love, no regrets about committing treason and adultery and even now, she felt no guilt about marrying the man she loved, the man who killed her husband, her brother-in-law. Perhaps if her dear departed husband had paid better attention to her, she'd not have fallen for his younger brother. His handsome, charming, dark younger brother. Her husband certainly had good qualities. He was a good leader, he knew his mind and he was loved by the people. She knew that he had good qualities. But they weren't the qualities that were attractive to her. She wanted charm, good looks, gentleness, and danger. Claudius was all those things, and she had no doubt that he secretly had the same qualities as his brother and in her love addled brain, she thought that in Claudius, those qualities were worth more.

Claudius was interesting, the one who had always been there when she needed someone here in Denmark. The brother that had spoken German to her from the very beginning, the one she was able to communicate with. He was her best friend and though he was not always at Elsinore, she still loved him more than anything. She could always write to him, he would always return to Elsinore if she even hinted that she needed him. It made her more careful ever since she realized that he would drop everything and run to her at any given time. It looked suspicious the few times it had happened. Though her husband paid as little attention to her as possible, he did notice how his brother seemed to turn up every time his wife was upset and his mere arrival would bring a smile to her face. On the occasions that Claudius was at Elsinore, his brother was too eager for his departure. When Gertrude would bring up assigning Claudius to her personal guard, the King would only shrug and either say that he'd think about it or that his brother was more useful in a military capacity.

Gertrude hated that her husband only wanted his brother away from Elsinore, because she had seen his battle scars and feared that one day, something would happen to him that would be much worse than a simple scar. Some of his scars already scared her and even though he loved being abroad, she knew he would much rather be at Elsinore protecting the one he loved more than anything. She had spoken to him about him taking over as Captain of her guard, and he did want the position, yet his brother hadn't even consulted him on the matter. He wanted the position because he'd then have almost unlimited access to the woman he loved, and he'd be able to protect her. There was nothing he wanted more than to be with Gertrude, and he would do anything if it meant that they would be as close to each other as possible.

Claudius had given her so much that her own husband had neglected to give her. He had protected her, been her best friend, and above all else, he'd made her feel beautiful and loved. His desire made her happy because it told her that at least someone truly wanted her, even though she'd never be able to truly satisfy her husband. She had tried of course, but he had been in love with another woman, before Gertrude had married him, and upon her timely death, everyone thought it best that Gertrude marry Hamlet instead of Claudius. That was the day that told her that she might not ever be happy. Her heart had broken. She had gone so far as to beg her father to make them change their minds and let her marry Claudius. But no, according to them, it was much more important that Hamlet got married. He would be the king soon enough and a king needs an heir. She had been so heartbroken and desperate to belong to Claudius that the night before her wedding, she had gone to Claudius and persuaded him to bed her. She had hoped that their bedding would be enough for at least Hamlet to call off the wedding, who would ever want to marry a woman who had been in bed with their brother? It hadn't worked and she was still made to marry Hamlet.

Their wedding night had not been pleasant. Hamlet had been beyond angry that he was not the only one to bed his wife. He insulted her, calling her a whore, ungrateful, adulterate, and told her that if he didn't have to, he wouldn't touch her. She had wished that it wasn't necessary, because he had been beyond rough. Though she had experienced pain with Claudius, what she got from her husband and his anger was much worse than the pain she expected when she lost herself to Claudius. The next day, she had all but ran to Claudius to beg him to fix everything. She couldn't have another night like the one she'd just had. He had tears in his eyes at the sight of her, he had wanted to take her pain away, take her from his brother's wrath, but he couldn't. He had held her in his arms as long as he dared. Little did he know that his brother had caught them in their embrace.

The next day, Claudius had been sent away from Elsinore by Hamlet, and he took Gertrude's heart with him. Soon enough, however, she had a child. She may have given the child her husband's name, but she always held onto the hope that he was Claudius'. It was a possibility after all. He was a good baby, but even guessing who the father was proved to be an impossible feat. Whichever of the two brothers was the father, she was unable to tell. They had similar features and even though her little Hamlet barely took after her, she had to account for her own features. She knew not to bring up the possibility that Hamlet was Claudius' child, it would enrage him to no end. She wasn't sure if he had ever considered the possibility. She had found out she was pregnant so soon after the wedding, that the likelihood of Hamlet being conceived the night before or soon after the wedding was extremely high. She knew that she would much rather her son be Claudius'. He was the better man. Much more worthy of such a child.  
Now, over a quarter of a century later, she wasn't sure what she believed anymore. Her son seemed to hate her (maybe Claudius deserved a better son), her husband was dead and she was married to her lover now. Her lover was the king, and he was also her husband. She could barely wrap her head around how fast everything had happened. One day, she and Claudius were sneaking around, the next day, her husband was dead, and the day after that, her lover had proposed and been named king.

But that was still nothing to compare to the anxiety she felt about how her son looked. He had grown up to look like Claudius. She felt relief, but that relief brought anxiety. There was always a chance that the people would catch on, that either Claudius or Hamlet would catch on and that she would be under fire. She didn't think that Claudius would mind that it was more than just a possibility that Hamlet was his son. Claudius had a fondness for her son; Hamlet on the other hand would have the complete opposite reaction to his uncle (or father, whichever he was). The people would say things about her and sooner or later, she wouldn't be able to take it anymore. If her son was in the line of fire for being a bastard, she and Claudius would be under the same fire for producing a bastard before she married the king.

If only she hadn't needed to marry Hamlet after having Claudius. Then she would be certain. She'd never have cheated on Claudius with Hamlet. Not for all the gold in the world. Claudius was her world and she wanted to give him everything. If she had given him everything, then Hamlet was his. She had given all of herself to him without question and she had no doubt that she would always remain his one and only.

She had given all of herself to him without question and she had no doubt that she would always remain his one and only. If she didn't remain his one and only, she had no idea what that would mean for her, apart from ruin. She loved Claudius and was sure that she would never be able to even pretend that she loved her husband anymore. Thankfully, he was dead and she had nothing to fear anymore. Not that falling out of love with him was ever really fearful to her, Hamlet paid such little attention to her that he probably wouldn't have really noticed if she and Claudius had made love in the audience chamber with him sitting right beside them. He had spent all his time with other women throughout their marriage, and yet somehow, her son still thought that she should be mourning his death. She would never have it in her heart to mourn the man who had made her a laughing stock for most of their marriage. Every time she found out about him with another woman, she was filled with rage and she felt like a fool. At least she and Claudius were discreet, but then they had no choice. If their affair was revealed, the pair of them would have been executed for treason.

Gertrude hated the way the world was run, but she consistently kept quiet about it. She would never show anyone how much she hated her husband and hated her life. The only people she lived for were her son and Claudius, and even then, her son didn't seem to want her around. He all but admitted to hating her and wanting her dead. Claudius was what stopped her from leaving Elsinore and finding some place where no one knew her name. It would be easier. A queen without a king; in chess it would be impossible. But now, she had a king again, and her life was easier. Claudius was her king and her lover; and even their marriage had changed nothing between them. He was as loving as ever and Gertrude knew that she could not have asked for a better lover.

Claudius would always be good to her, of that she had no doubt. He would never hurt her like his brother had. Hamlet hadn't been really abusive, but he did have a way with words that had always left her feeling like a nothing; and if she had angered him enough, he would strike her. Never when Claudius was around, for he knew that his brother would defend Gertrude to his dying breath, but one time when he showed up unexpected, he had seen the last markings of a bruise. That night had been hell for Gertrude, listening to the two men yell at each other back and forth about how her husband treated her. After their argument had ceased, Claudius had come into her room and sat guard all night, making sure Hamlet didn't come in and try to hurt her again. She felt safe sleeping that night, and Claudius was still there when she had woken in the morning. He had kissed her and made love to her, hoping to reassure her that someone did love her. It had worked, though she had not wanted to let go of him afterwards.

Thinking back on all that they had been through together, she knew that there was one person she could trust above all else, and that would be Claudius. She wouldn't lie to him or keep secrets from him. And she knew that he wouldn't keep secrets from her unless it was to protect her. She was lucky to have such a man like him as her lover. Her lover turned husband, her champion. They always had each other's backs, and would watch out for one another.

Claudius was always her champion in all the tournaments her late husband had thrown. She would always bet on him, and he would never fail her. Her husband thought her a fool, always betting on the same man, her brother-in-law no less. He had not failed her, except for once, and even then he hadn't truly failed her. She had put all her money (and then some) on his win in the tournament for Prince Hamlet's names day and he had been unhorsed in the jousting. To pay the debt, all she had was one of the gifts her lover had given her, and it had broken her heart to give it up. When Claudius found out, he had got the pendant back and paid off Gertrude's debt, giving everything back to her with apologies. He had been scolded by his brother, but it hadn't mattered. The deed was done and he had proved his love to Gertrude once again. His explanation had been that he didn't wish for Gertrude to lose her faith in him and his love. Little did he know until she told him that her faith in his love would never be lost. His only reply had been that he did not regret doing what he had done for her, before kissing her softly and making her his.

She would never grow tired of Claudius, no matter what happened. He was hers, she was his. Nothing would come between them, and if it tried, Claudius would defend their love and destroy whatever it was. Including his brother. She knew, deep in her heart, that her late husband had not died of a serpent's bite, but by his brother's hand. Hamlet had been behaving strangely around her in the days prior to his death and the strange behaviour was bordering on violent. He had tried to stay away from her and the only way he would look at her was with disgust. After his death, it had become apparent to her that he had discovered the secret that she and Claudius had been keeping from him. She had played him well if he had felt truly betrayed. She had been as affectionate as possible, especially around their son, and given him very little reason to suspect how much she had despised him.

Upon Claudius' proposal following the death of his brother, she had felt overwhelmed very briefly, wanting to marry Claudius in secret. He had told her that it would only cause gossip within the kingdom, so she had agreed to yet another very public wedding. The day of their wedding, she had wondered if it seemed more disrespectful to her late husband that they were publicly marrying so soon after his death and whether or not getting married in secret would have been better, never mind the gossip.

Her second wedding night had been much more enjoyable than the first. Claudius had shown her how much he loved her several times, and they'd not gotten a single wink of sleep that night. It had been the best night of her life up until that point. She no longer needed to hide that she was being thoroughly pleasured by Claudius. She had taken complete advantage of being able to cry out as loud as she could. He was the perfect mix between gentle and rough, and she knew that there was nothing better in the world than being married to such a perfect man. Her fears that being married to Claudius would change something about their love had, in a way, been proven true; but it was not in the way that she had expected. The ability to be open about their relationship had made their love better.

The day after the wedding, neither she nor Claudius had been seen by anyone except the servants, who brought them wine and food when they wanted it. The majority of their time had been spent wrapped up in each other, making love, cuddling, sleeping and even when they were eating and drinking, she was in his arms. He made her laugh and he made her have no doubt that she was the luckiest woman in the world. He had given her gifts and had her wear them for him (promising that they were for his eyes only). The hours they had spent wrapped in each other's arms had involved a lot of kissing as well. Gertrude had been kissed everywhere by her lover and she couldn't keep the smile from her face.

That day had made her wish that they would have more than just that day and the next like that before they resumed their lives as King and Queen of Denmark. She knew that she would encounter problems keeping her hands off Claudius at court, and she had no doubts as to what problems he would have keeping his hands and lips off of her at court. It would take so much restraint for them to not reach out and touch or kiss the other. It would feel like it had before, and she couldn't bear that.

The next day, minus some brief touching on the way to the audience chamber, she and Claudius had managed to conduct themselves very well. It didn't feel like it had when she had been married to Hamlet and for that she was pleased. Her son's reaction to seeing her and Claudius happy together had been one of almost disgust. She knew he was disgusted by the recent events of her marriage to Claudius, and she supposed he had every right to be. To him, she had appeared happy with her late husband, his 'father' (she still couldn't be sure if Hamlet had been her son's father or not), and it would take him time to adjust to her being married to his 'uncle'.

During their time in the audience chamber, though they were managing themselves very well, Gertrude found that she wanted to reach out and touch Claudius often, maybe kiss him once or twice. Once they left, she touched his hand gently and the two of them went off to her bedchamber once again, summoning the servants to bring them more wine. They were to host a grand party that night, in celebration of their wedding. They had time to spend together, but they didn't have the amount of time together they wanted to have. Gertrude could only guess how drunk they would be by the end of the night, especially when they had started drinking long before the party began. Their alone time was balanced between drinking and love making. She knew Claudius had not intended to bed her in the beginning, but after a few cups of wine, his lips had begun to wander and soon enough, they were on the bed and enjoying the other once again. She wasn't complaining; how could she? She loved having her lover between her legs, holding her close, proving that she was indeed loved when she had felt unloved for so long in her life.

Having Claudius by her side had made her life better. Not easier or harder, but at the very least, it was better. She felt loved and she felt as though she had a reason for living. He had brought so much meaning back into her life and she couldn't thank him enough for that. She wished she could find a way to thank him for saving her from her life.

Over the next few months, she noticed a change in her son. Hamlet had begun to scare her in a way that not even she could describe. He seemed to be going mad, and it was worrying her. Was her marriage to Claudius the cause of this, and if it wasn't, what was the cause of her son's downward spiral.

When Polonius approached her and Claudius, claiming to know the cause of Hamlet's apparent madness, she admitted she was relieved. However, when he claimed that the cause of Hamlet's madness was the rejection of Ophelia, she was nothing short of confused. Why on Earth would Polonius encourage his daughter to reject her son so soon after the loss of his father, so soon after her remarriage? Why would he want his daughter to reject her son when being with him would make her queen in the future? She knew better than most that parents used their daughters to further their ambition. Her own father had made her marry Hamlet for the simple reason that it would make her Queen of Denmark. She had hated him for so long because she wasn't allowed to marry the brother of the man who would be king, it had to be the king himself. She knew Polonius to be ambitious, so why would he request his daughter reject the future king?

When she and Claudius finally left and retired for a while, she was more than glad to be alone with him. Her arms wound around his neck and she pressed gentle kisses to his face, hoping to relieve some of the tension he was feeling. She knew the last couple of months had taken a toll on him, as they had taken a toll on her. She could see it in his eyes, and she wanted to fix that. She hated seeing her lover so tense. She pulled him gently towards their bed, sitting him down on it, curling into his back, rubbing his shoulders. She whispered relaxing things into his ear, telling him how much she loved him. After a time, it seemed to relax him. She couldn't be happier that he was calm, though she did have the feeling that it would not last very long. Rosencrantz and Guildenstern would soon report back to her and Claudius and they would know more about their son's behaviour. She couldn't help being worried about what they might have found out and she wasn't sure if she was more worried about that or how Claudius would react to what they had discovered.

Upon their return to the audience chamber, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern informed her and Claudius of what they had learned (which was close to nothing, she wasn't pleased to discover). The pair had been cryptic with their description of Hamlet's behaviour, which worried and annoyed her at the same time. She prayed that it was only lovesickness for Ophelia that had driven him into such a state, and not something like her remarriage. She loved Hamlet, he was her son; but she had loved Claudius longer than she had loved Hamlet; he had been her lover since before Hamlet was born. She had loved Claudius for even longer than they had been lovers, and she knew he felt the same about her. But even her mother's love for Hamlet would not make her stop loving Claudius.

One thing had her suspicion, this play that was being put on. She knew that it would be harmless, but she couldn't help but wonder about Hamlet's behaviour surrounding the play. He was overly excited about such a thing. She knew that he enjoyed seeing players perform, but this was over the top, even for him. Perhaps it was another aspect of his insanity, or perhaps he was planning something. She had no idea what it might be, but if he was planning something, she did know that it would be aimed at the man she loved. Hamlet, like his father (or uncle, be it either which) had been against Claudius from the beginning. Her son hated her for remarrying Claudius of all people.  
It had been her own foolishness that told her to keep how happy she was with Claudius from her son. If she had told him the truth of her marriage to his 'father', perhaps he would have been more understanding. Nevertheless, she went to the play on her husband's arm, becoming more and more suspicious and offended by the play the longer it went on. She knew that Claudius was just as offended as she was, if not more. It took only a brief amount of time before she realized that she had been right to be suspicious of her son. Hamlet's plan was obviously to try and make Claudius feel guilty for what he had done. She only wanted to know how Hamlet had found out about Claudius' deed in the first place. Surely he didn't know the whole story, he couldn't.  
Claudius soon rose and left the throne room, Gertrude wanting to run after him, but she refrained, knowing that she needed to speak to her son and that Claudius would want a small amount of the to himself. She always knew when to leave Claudius be for a little while. Leaving the throne room and heading in the direction of her quarters, she instructed Rosencrantz and Guildenstern to inform Hamlet that she wished to speak to him and where she was going. Once she was there, she sat nervously until Polonius arrived. His presence, once a tolerable one, now only agitated her. He continued talking until they heard Hamlet coming, at which point, Polonius ducked behind the arras.  
Gertrude began confronting Hamlet about his behaviour, which he only answered with rudeness and for the first time in her life, she was scared of her son. She screamed for help and Polonius echoed her cry, which made her panic even more. After Hamlet stabbed Polonius through the arras, Gertrude's panic peaked. Hamlet continued arguing with her about Claudius and his father's death, until something finally made him stop. He was talking to the air which did nothing to sooth Gertrude's nerves. Her son was truly mad and kept on asking her if she saw what he was seeing. It was the first time since the death of her dear departed husband that she had wanted to run into Claudius' arms for safety.  
Once he had calmed down and stopped insisting that something was there when it really wasn't, Gertrude felt a sense of calm try to take over her. When Hamlet left dragging the body of her husband's adviser, her head fell into her hands and she tried to breathe deeply.  
Once Claudius arrived, he wrapped his arms around her tightly without her even needing to ask. Just as she knew how to read her husband, he knew how to read her. They were a perfect match. She told him of what had happened as calmly as she could, and he called for Rosencrantz and Guildenstern to find Hamlet and poor old Polonius. He carried Gertrude to his bedchamber and posted a guard at his door, promising that he would be back once all was set right. She knew his words to be truthful, for he had never lied to her in all the time they had known one another. Gertrude poured herself a cup of wine and went to sit on the bed she shared with her husband. As she drank, she thought about 2 things. One, that though Hamlet had told her he was not truly mad, he must have been, for there was no other explanation for his behaviour. Two, there was no way that Hamlet was the son of Claudius, he was far too wild. He must be her late husband's son.  
Upon Claudius' return, he informed her that Hamlet was leaving for England straight away, to which she had no problem. After all, it would be for the best. Here, in Denmark, he was a threat. In England, he would meet his fate. Her only child would be put to death for what he had done. Because of this, Denmark would have no heir, for she was certainly too old to give her darling Claudius a son (they had tried to have a child together, but they failed). It upset her even more because she knew that Claudius would make a wonderful father and she would never make him one. As he readied himself for bed, he handed Gertrude her nightgown, which she took and waited until he had finished to ask him to help her undress.  
He had always enjoyed undressing her and as usual, he took the opportunity to plant small kisses on her shoulders and back. Though he usually only had the opportunity to undress her when they were going to be making loved, both of them knew without saying so, that tonight they would not. It would be the second night since her late husband passed that they would not make love, the first being the night before their wedding. He would hold her tonight, but that was all.  
The next couple of days were a blur. When Laertes had returned from France in an uproar over his father's death, leading a large group of Danes who wished to seat him on the throne, Gertrude could not believe it. Her whole world was crashing down around her. Her son was a murderer, darling Ophelia had lost her mind, Laertes was in an uproar over everything; and she and Claudius were at risk of losing everything they held dear. If Elsinore fell, Claudius faced certain death, and no doubt she would face it too. She had never been so scared in her life.  
Ophelia's entrance upset Gertrude more than she could say. The poor girl had been driven insane by the death of her father at the hands of the man she loved. But, it takes a woman to understand the subtle words of another woman, and Gertrude could tell that Ophelia was blaming her husband, and her, for everything that had happened. When she handed Gertrude rue, the Queen of Denmark swore to herself that something must be done. She couldn't have her secrets spilled by a mad woman.  
Soon after, a messenger brought a letter for her from Hamlet. Reading the letter made her sick to her stomach. Her son was returning to Denmark and vowed to kill her husband. She threw the letter into the fire ad left the castle to try and calm herself. She loved her son as every mother loves their child, but she loved Claudius as one loves the dearest love if their heart. Her mind was still reeling when she saw Ophelia amongst the flowers. The stream below, where the poor girl stood, was deep. Deep enough to drown the wretch quickly if she fell. If she fell, Gertrude thought. Her mad ramblings would cease and my secrets would be safe. Could she make certain that the girl would fall? Of course she could, it would only take a light push.  
Silently, she approached the young woman who had been through so much already; and the Queen couldn't help but overhear her singing about lost love. She paused for a moment and wondered if she really had to do this. If she could really do this. Ophelia did, after all, remind the Queen of herself at a young age. Not in every sense, but the two of them had certainly experienced pain because of love. It was best for Ophelia if she left the world now, and Gertrude would help her do so. Taking that final step, Gertrude put her arms out and pushed Ophelia into the water. She was still singing and Gertrude watched until she was pulled under the water, never to sing again.  
Strangely enough, Gertrude didn't feel anything that would suggest guilt. As she walked back to the castle, she planned out exactly how she would tell her husband and Laertes of Ophelia's death. Claudius, the man who could read her so easily, would see through her lie, but she had to make it sound as though she couldn't have stopped it. For Laertes' sake she needed to do that.  
As she told the two men of what had happened, she found that lying was really quite easy. One that loves a liar with all their heart should be a liar as well. After Laertes had stormed out, Claudius took Gertrude's hand and led her to find Laertes so they could try and calm him down again. Once they found him, they calmed him easily, promising him that Ophelia would still receive a Christian burial and that they would ensure that much at least.  
Leaving Laertes to grieve his sister and father, Claudius led Gertrude to his bedchamber, and held her in his arms. When he drew back, he pulled her gently to their bed and sat down on it with her. Pressing light kisses to her hair, he revealed that he knew she was lying about how Ophelia died. He asked her what truly happened, and she told him of her deed. She knew that he would never betray her, for she knew of his own murderous deeds and she would never betray those.  
The pair didn't leave the bedchamber for the rest of the day under the guise that he was caring for his wife who was having difficulties coping with what she had seen that day. Instead the pair spent the day drinking wine and Claudius thought about what he had done to Gertrude to make her a liar and a murderess. She did love a lying murderer and that man, he himself, had turned her into one of his kind. He still loved her with all his heart and still had no doubt that she felt the same about him. And as they fell asleep that night, wrapped around each other naked, Claudius held his wife tightly in his arms, and prayed that no one would ever uncover their secrets.  
The next morning, the pair prepared for Ophelia's funeral. They would need to put on an air of innocence about the whole affair to ensure no one was suspicious in any way, and Gertrude would need to look and seem sadder than she truly was. The funeral was easier than either of them had anticipated until Laertes jumped into the grave and Hamlet revealed himself, which led the two young men to get into a fight with one another.  
Once the fight had been broken up, everyone returned to the castle, and Gertrude ran to find Claudius who had disappeared with Laertes. When she found them, they were deep in conversation with Osric, a courtier, about a fencing match that Osric was to propose to Hamlet. When Osric left, Gertrude went straight into Claudius' arms in a panic. With Hamlet's return, she feared for the safety of the man she loved. She kept remembering Hamlet's letter, where he had vowed to kill Claudius. Claudius rubbed her back soothingly, trying to reassure her that all would be well once again. That in a few hours, their world would be set right again. She knew exactly what he meant by that. She knew that somehow, her son would die. He would die because Claudius needed to keep the only person he cared about in this whole world safe. Her son would die because of her. The couple stayed as they were for a little while before Claudius took her face in his hands and kissed her softly. They kissed for a moment, Claudius backing her up so he was against a wall as he held her. She knew exactly what he was trying to tell her, that he loved her no matter what happened and that everything he did was because of the love he had for her. Even though she already knew all of this, reassurance of the fact did make her feel better.  
When he finally took her hand to lead her to the throne room for the fencing match, she began to wonder if the love she and Claudius had would conquer all that threatened them. They had conquered his brother and Ophelia; but could her late husband's equally hateful son be conquered by love. Hamlet and Claudius were at war with one another and she was caught in the middle as the mother to one and the devoted and loving wife of the other.  
As she sat by Claudius' side, she realized that none of this would ever have happened if she has never been present. Or if she had been permitted to marry Claudius in the first place. The latter was truly the fault of her father and Claudius' father (as well as her late husband), but she still felt as though it was her fault.  
When Claudius put the pearl in the wine, Gertrude made her decision. She would end the rotting of Denmark, because none but her could do so. The war between brothers, the war between her son and her love, everything rotten could be traced back to her. She knew her husband had put poison into the wine. Poison may be called a woman's weapon by many, but to Gertrude, it was Claudius' weapon. It always had been.  
She knew her death would break Claudius' heart, but she prayed that he would not suffer without her. He had once told her that without her, he could not live. Drinking the poisoned wine would lead to his death, and though she loved him, she now couldn't help but think that perhaps it was a good thing. She and Claudius, partners in crime, two murdering liars, lovers, treasonous and adulterate; they were the most rotten beings in all of Denmark. They would bring nothing good to the people if they continued ruling the people of Denmark.  
She stood and walked to her son, trying to wipe his brow before taking the cup and as she was about to drink, her husband called out for her not to drink. As she drank, she reflected that this was the only time she had ever defied the man she loved. As the fencing match progressed, Gertrude finally began to feel the effects of the poison before finally dropping to the ground not far from Claudius. Her last act before dying was to warn her son about the poison, praying that he would listen.  
In the end, Gertrude's death was nothing more than a desperate bid to have her husband follow her and fix the rotten state of Denmark. And still, she did not break her vow to love him until the end of her days. Even as she died, she loved Claudius with all of her heart.

finis.


End file.
